Effective managers need to be both 'requiring' of their direct reports, but must also 'relate' to each person as an individual. One of my favorite books is called The 2R Manager, [Jossey Bass, 2002]. It was written by Peter Friedes, the former CEO of the HR consulting firm Hewitt Associates. (Full disclosure: I liked the book so much, I wrote the foreword.)
Pete's basic insight is that, to be effective in managing others, we must know both how to be "requiring" of people (that's the first R) – make sure that they deliver on and live up to the tasks they take on, and must also do this in a way that "relates" (the second R) to each individual.
Other people have written about this before, calling the two dimensions "task-orientation" and "people-orientation." In Pete's analysis, the two dimensions can define several kinds of managers.
The first four are the extremes:
The Abdicator: too low requiring, too low relating;
The Demander: too high requiring, too low relating;
The Pleaser: too low requiring, too high relating;
The Overwhelmer: too high requiring, too high relating.
What I like about this is that it reminds us that you can have too much or too little of anything. Relating, for example, may be good, but not if you overuse it.
On my blog, Pete points out that Michael Scott on NBC's The Office is definitely a "pleaser" and, like most Pleasers, doesn't please anyone. He is a severe Over-Relater and non-existent Requirer.
Then there are four other types of manager that are less problematical, but still less than perfect:
The Supervisor: About right requiring, but too low relating;
The Friend: About right relating, but too low requiring;
The Encroacher: About right requiring, but too high relating;
The Energizer: About right relating, but too high requiring.
One of the reasons that these styles can be problematical is a powerful insight that Pete offers – rather than tending toward balance, each of us has a natural tendency toward greater imbalance. For example, suppose that your natural preference is to be on the high-requiring side of things. What are you likely to do if things don't go well? The answer, alas, is that high-requirers will "up the ante" and try requiring some more – that's what they have a preference for and what they know how to do. Similarly, high-relaters, in the face of nonperformance, have a tendency to try to relate some more.
That's what's so insightful about Pete's work. What each of us needs to learn is how to work on our weakest dimension so that we can bring both requiring and relating to bear. Only then will we be truly effective in getting the best out of others and be what Pete calls the "2R Manager."
How does a relater learn how to be more requiring? Pete suggests, among many other tactics, learning to get comfortable saying something like, "I need you to do this." As he says, being assertive isn't cruel or uncaring – it's talking straight, but it does mean you have to learn to become more comfortable with conflict.
For requirers to learn how to relate better, they need to work at listening and understanding the motivation that those being managed have to succeed. If there are real barriers for the individual in delivering a higher performance, just becoming more demanding won't work. Among other things, you must help the person remove the barriers.
In a lot of business writing today, there's an encouragement to "ignore one's weaknesses and build on strengths." There's some truth to that, but not when it comes to managing people and getting the best out of them. You can't ignore your (relative) weakness – whether it be relating or requiring. You have to learn how to be both – the 2R manager.
Of all these types, what are you? What about your boss?
David Maister is one of the consulting industry's leading authorities on the management of professional service firms. He can be reached at david@davidmaister.com. Please e-mail your story comments to customercare@alm.com.
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